I’m warning ya’ll now, as I’m entering my last month of my master’s program (how the hell did it go so fast?!?) expect me to start dropping some sentimental shit. I’ve been reflecting a lot on the girl that entered the grad program in Fall 2011 and the woman who is going to be walking in just a month. And honestly, that is the perfect analogy because I’ve changed in so many ways and know that I will continue to grow as I enter a Ph.D. program.
Although, I really am just looking forward to this year off. I need some sleep.
To be continued.
Just got 8 books for my last seminar on race for only $140, woohoooooooo!
But knowing that I will be reading 8 books, in a class with one of the tougher (known) professors in the department, noooooooooo. And she may be out for a vengeance since this is her last semester at my school. Here’s to busting my butt and many nights in to keep that 4.0.
Things I should be excited about this semester:
Finishing my thesis
Submitting two journal articles
Attending a conference in Nevada
Graduating
Things I’m actually excited about this semester:
Trips to San Fran, Mammoth, and Minneapolis
LT coming to visit
Beyond Wonderland rave in San Bernadino
Aztec basketball games
My graduation celebration at Disneyland
Graduating
Grad school makes you the WORST, UNFOCUSED procrastinator of all time.
EXPECTATION:
REALITY:
collab: Greent33 and WSWCGS
GPOY…all day, every day.
Yep, that’s grad school life.
Hence why I am going to the department brunch tomorrow. I don’t turn down free food.
(via k3bby)
LIFE OF A GRAD STUDENT, VOL. 51
Desktop Snapshot: I just finished my table of descriptive variables for my thesis. For those of you who have/are writing a thesis, this is the peak of the mountain and understand my need for celebration. Although this is likely to get some additions/subtractions from my list of variables this week, it feel so great to have a somewhat concrete idea of what I will be examining. Soon, I will begin the steady decline down the mountain of thesis writing.
I’ve been struggling to find the time to really focus on my thesis/article due to focusing on my other article I’m writing. However, this week, I had my thesis epiphany while reading D. Massey’s article on the theories of international migration. I immediately knew which variables I was going to examine to explain behaviors, how I was going to finish up my lit. review, and how I was going to explain my findings. It was a moment of clarity that I really needed.
Onwards and upwards!
These past few weeks have been very difficult for me. I can honestly say, this is the most overwhelmed I’ve felt in a long time or ever. I’ve always been notorious for overextending myself or taking on too many tasks. However, I typically find that I can operate best under stress. However, its finding that point where its a bit too much. I felt an anxiety attack coming on during my drive to school this morning and I was tearing up every time my mentor was asking if I was okay.
Besides working on my thesis, which I’m currently waiting on the data to be cleaned and weighted by my mentor before I can move on, I am working on a journal article on the relationship between an undocumented Latino migrant having a U.S. born child and psychological distress. Because I am unfamiliar with literature surrounding mental health, its been horribly time consuming. The literature review must be structured around multiple explanatory variables, not just migration behavior and distress. I find myself devoting more time than necessary to the article. I will be presenting the results at the Pacific Sociological Association’s conference in March, so I feel immense pressure from both myself and my mentor to have the article be thorough. Basically, it has to be perfect.
So, on top of tutoring 23 students, holding office hours and other TA duties, taking two classes, fulfilling my field practicum duties, and working on my thesis, I must dedicate time to this article. My advice to any current and/or future grad students is to remember to take time for yourself, which I must learn to take this advice. My 5K training schedule has fallen to the way side (so no Color Run this fall), reading for pleasure is non-existent, I haven’t done laundry in over a month, and by the time I socialize with friends and family on the weekend, I’m so exhausted that I would rather be sleeping or I’m thinking about all the work I could be doing.
My goal for this week is to set aside an hour each day, preferably not right before I go to bed, to do whatever I want. With this hour, I feel I will be able to navigate my way back to the calmness and positivity I felt before.
If you are a college student, please realize how annoying it is, as an underpaid TA, to read your horribly written papers. You are in college, not junior high, write like it.
The fact that I did a happy skip down the hall when I saw my department bought us a KCup coffee maker means I need to get a life. But its the small things in life, right?
Perfectly brewed Dunkin’ Donuts coffee, here I come.
Between working 40 hours at week in retail hell and entering data like a mad woman, I haven’t had too much of a ‘life.’ I just need to remind myself that these late nights will pay off in the long run.
A few good things have happened, in the grad school realm, in the last few weeks though.
First, my mentor (whom I’m doing data entry with) asked me to be a co-author on the community report he is doing. And, we’re going to set it up so it will count as a field practicum. The community report needs to be done by the end of September/beginning of October. After its submitted, I only have one class to worry about this semester. Thankfully, all this unpaid hard work I’m putting in will now not only go towards an article(s) and my thesis, but a community health report with a respected organization.
Second, I talked with my mentor about whether I should definitely take a year off and what my possibilities look like for that said year. I really have no idea why this decision has been so hard for me to make. I think I just wanted to make sure I was spending the year doing something constructive to enhance my Ph.D. applications, because if not, what’s the point of taking off a year? He gave me a few options to think about and once I decide which steps I want to take, we can get the ball rolling. But, he’s pushing for me to write a grant to write a paper using his data and implementing the questions about sexual health (since that’s my area of interest). Or, allowing him to contact a professor at Princeton so I can use both their data to publish an article. He said that will be the most effective way to become a promising Ph.D. applicant at the schools I am interested in.
Third, my friend and fellow cohort member received a scholarship which will allow her to travel to Ph.D. programs for visits (GO M!!!! So proud of her <3). She asked me if I would like to ride along with her, since we will be applying to similar schools. So, I will be able to knock out all my visits to CA Ph.D. programs a year before applying so I can be absolutely sure I want to apply there (since they’re so expensive!). Plus, I will be able to visit parts of CA that I’ve never been to before. And, she’s never been back east before but really wants to apply to a few programs in NYC and DC. Although it won’t be covered by her scholarship, we are in the beginning stages of planning a trip back east to do a mini road trip to NYC, a pit stop in NJ for me, and some time in DC so we can visit her programs AND so she can see the amazingness that is the east coast.
I know this coming year (I do years by Fall semester to Fall semester, not January to January like normal people) will be a lot of stress, late nights, exhaustion, etc. but when its all said and done, I will be starting the next chapter in my life. And, that is something to look forward to.
Two summers ago, I did an internship at a domestic violence shelter in downtown San Diego as a requirement for my degree and to boost my grad school apps. It was one of the best yet heartbreaking summers of my life. I used previous research, applied the observations, and turned out a great paper on the experiences of young children in an urban domestic violence shelter. It was my first experience with public sociology. I worked primarily with the children who came with their mothers to stay in the shelter. Every day we did arts and crafts, played outside on the terrace, I read to them, I made them lunches, and we went on fun field trips. All while not really being able to communicate verbally because the majority of them didn’t know English and my Spanish isn’t the best. It was a lot of smiles, nodding, and hugs.
Today at work, one of the mothers and her son came in to look at clothes. He was the same curious, energetic child he was two years ago except slightly taller. He was always very close with his mother and he was diligently following behind her, looking at everything and never once complaining and asking numerous questions. One of the policies of working in a shelter is that you are unable to show recognition outside the shelter environment, no matter how close you are to the individual. I walked by and customer serviced them, as I would any other customer, and I knew she didn’t recognize me.
After I rang them up at the register and said goodbye, I realized that these individuals and the entire experience completely changed my life, however, myself and the shelter was just a blip on the road of their life. As they walked away and I was tearing up (from both a sadness and happiness), I wish I could have thanked them for how much they impacted my life, how much they meant to me, and how much they taught me about positivity and its power.
